Why I Hope Trump Is Elected

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  1. If country goes bankrupt, he already knows where to file the papers.
  2. “Mount Rushmore of Stupid Presidents” needs someone next to Harding.
  3. He’d buy Greece, turn a failing country into a failing country with a failing Trump Parthenon Casino.
  4. It would help third world countries feel better about their politicians.
  5. The super-rich would finally have a voice in our government.
  6. Washington and Lincoln would probably be happy to roll over in their graves.
  7. I’m so excited about Vice-President Mark Cuban!
  8. He’d get Congress to stop debating economy and climate, focus their energies on hair care!
  9. Victory would mean extra water ration for slaves who work at his hotels.
  10. I’d make millions from my “Dump Trump” merchandise!
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